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How many squares of toilet paper do you use?


Neville

How many squares of toilet paper do you use?

This is an important question:

How many squares of toilet paper do you use per wipe?

At home I typically use 3. I feel this is the optimum amount for safe coverage without being too wasteful:

3 squares toilet paper

I personally think the "ball-up-and-scrunch" method for wiping is not only inefficient and wasteful.....but also less comfortable and gives a more unreliable wipe.

I personally like to fold one end till the 1/6th mark first:

3 squares folded toilet paper

Then I take that remaining 1/6th as a "handle" and fold it back over:

3 stacked toilet paper squares

This 3-Square-Stack is the right size and density for maximum comfort, efficiency, and economy. In public I'll use 4-5 squares per stack depending on ply thickness.

In public, the goal is often to get OUT of the restroom quick as possible.

So to shave a full minute off time, I invented this new method about 2 years ago, and I believe it's an innovation in toilet paper folding technology:

I will "pre-prepare" these folded stacks of toilet paper during downtime, so when cleanup time comes, I'm ready to go without doing any additional pulling and folding!! Generally 6 stacks are sufficient:

6-stacks-toilet-paper.jpg

In a public restroom you don't have much clean space, so I rest these stacks in the safe confines of my clothing:

6 stacks ready toilet paper pants

I'm not sure if they award Nobel Peace Prizes for innovations like this, but please recommend me in the upcoming vote.

I once encountered a person who said they wrap their hand in toilet paper for each wipe?? I called the cops on them immediately for this egregious waste:

toilet paper mitten wrap

We're trying to live in a society here people....

 

So....how many squares of toilet paper do YOU use per wipe?

Leave your answer in the comments below!

Sincerely,

Neville

P.S. It's totally understandable if you use a fake name in the comments!

P.P.S. While it's ok to be descriptive, please try not to use much graphic language or be too gross.

P.P.P.S. Example responses might include:

- "3 squares."

- "6 on the first, 3 on the rest."

- "I only use Japanese toilets and therefore need none."

P.P.P.P.S. Want to see a visual representation of everyone's answers?

You can see them all in this Google Spreadsheet:

google sheet visualization example


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Recommended Comments



Guest Tom Sharp

Posted

I have no idea, as my butler does it for me, with squares of silk, and I have no idea what happens to it afterwards.
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Guest Piiiills, baby

Posted

Toilet paper? I use the carpet, naturally. A small video demonstration "attached" above.
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I've never really measures before. More testing is required. Estimated 18 squares
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I have no idea. I never count squares. I just fold over a comfortable amount & go to town. However, you pre-folding your TP in advance on your downtime Neville to save a minute is pretty anal.

Apparently you musta had an 'a-ha' moment sitting on the can to come up w/ this topic of diskussion.

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Depends on the quality (how many ply and size of the sheets) of the paper!! Single ply about 5?
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I personally use the Eatons Catalogue in my outhouse.

PS this is brilliant copy

PPS you win the Nobel Piece Prize

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Guest Kushal samaddar

Posted

I didn't use toilet paper... In India most of the ppl use water instead of paper and all...
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JUST WIPE, WIPE, WIPE, CHECK THEN WIPE, WIPE, CHECK WIPE- THEN AM DONE SO I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW MANY SQUARES I HAVE USED... ALL IS DONE I PRE-FOLDS.....
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Generally 10-15, but I'm in Asia right now and they have little toliet hoses to help you out. Makes your time on the bowl and conserving paper much easier :)
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Guest Gwen Cole

Posted

4 times 2. This is the weirdest blog post I've ever seen. Congratulations.
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Guest Bevan Hirst

Posted

hahahahaha! Brilliant, love your work Nevman

I also use 3 squares, as the perfect trade off between comfort and environmental management!

Prepping during 'downtime' is a fascinating idea :D

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Guest Manoj Philip

Posted

Bidet all the way! Jk, as much as I need to get the job done. Then I use wet wipes afterwards to get that "extra clean" feel.
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At home I use quality paper so 2 squares at a time. Usually x 3. Great post will be interesting to see how many respond. And much better than being concerned at the goings on of politicians. Cheers david
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Guest My name is not Jasper

Posted

Just use as much as you need bro. Keep that butt clean naw mean?
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Can you come teach this 3 square method to my toddler? She prefers 24 squares, balled up.

My personal strategy is four squares, or baby wipes, until I purchase one of those Tushy bidet attachments.

If you don’t have a pack of environmentally- friendly wipes on the back of your toilet yet, prepare to have your life changed. Totally 80/20’s your wiping experience.

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